Sick Little Kids

Nico has been complaining of headaches lately. Because I read so many blogs of people who have lost their children from so many freak accisents and scary diseases, I have been up all night thinking of the worst. I am sure it is a sinus infection. Of course, this shit ALWAYS happens on a weekend or a Holiday...WHY???? I want to take him to the ER, but my husband says wait it out. Why are men so calm when it comes to their children being sick??? I stayed up all night checking on him, while he slept like a baby. WTF??? Please pray for me that it is only a sinus infection and that his fever and headaches do NOT return today. May everyone have a nice, peaceful Memorial Day...as mine will be memorable I am sure!

The Real Housewives of Connellsville!!!

Just thinking about that title has me rolling on the ground! Can you picture that show??? I am addicted to all the Housewive show's. First it was O.C. Then I started watching N.Y. NOW, I am hooked on N.J. The only one I don't watch is Atlanta. The show (all of them) are so catty), that it is pathetic. But how can you NOT needless to get addicted? Especially when there is NOTHING else on TV? My husband does on-line school, so, he is pre-occupied for those hours in the evening. But, I really do need to be more productive, like write the children's book that I always dreamed of writing for my kids. It's just by the end of the day, my brain shuts off because I am so exhausted. :(
I really DO need to get off my dead rear and get something accomplished. Good luck to me~

Happy Birthday My Baby Boy!

Well, Yesterday was my son, Nico's fifth Birthday. It's hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that he is 5 years old! Typical mom word's, "It feel's like yesterday that I brought him home from the hospital!!!" We had a party for him at a local party place for kids. It was pricey, but fun. Of course, I am used to feeding the entire clan, which includes my husbands ten generation's, which he still has both grandparents alive (lucky bastard), and Aunts and Uncles, cousins, great- cousins-thier kids...you get the idea. My family consists of my mom, dad, and niece. Sad huh? Anyhoo, This place charges $2.00 for one drink, $1.00 for a small cup of ice cream (the one's you get at the convenient store for 25 cents), and $10.00 for a plain pizza.($2.00) each additional topping. So I opted to pay for kids only. How cheap did I sound? Obviously pretty much so. If I were to pay for everyone's meal, I would have been stuck with a $3-400.00 bill!!! I can't afford that! I have four kids to feed. My bill came to $140.00 and there were 9 kids there. 5 didn't show (Thank Goodness) it would have broke me! It's so sad what people charge these days. I would have been better off to have the party at home and made food for everyone. From now on, it will be. I thought I would save the wear and tear of my house (and stress), but in the long run, it's always better to have things at home. All in all, it turned out nice for Nico, he had fun, got alot of nice gifts...and sang karioke. THAT itself was worth the money! I would pay any amount of money to see my kids smile... and to keep them small!!!! I love you sweet baby boy, I hope you had the best Birthday ever!!!

My Tribute to Mother's Day...

There are so many WONDERFUL Mom's out there with so many different titles. Some have lost children, Some are raising children on their own, some are raising alot of children with the help of a spouse, and some have children who have grown and left the nest. I have encountered so many different people who have different "love" for children lately.
I read alot of blogs and comment on alot of different findings. My heart seems to go out to the women who's children have been taken from them for some reason or another, too soon. I couldn't imagine not having my children here with me on Mother's Day, or any other day for that matter. I find these women remarkably strong and true. Somehow they have found the strength to go on. My mother is one of those women. My sister passed away Janurary 2009. This was the 2cnd Mother's Day without her. She hides her pain very well. I know how much she hurts. How deep the wound is. I know how sick I feel. I can only begin to imagine how she must feel, it being her child.
Mother's Day took on a whole new meaning, of course, when I had my kids. It became "my day". I look forward to it each year. It gives me a sense of accomplishment towards my kids. I am very proud of my children and step-children. Proud of who they are and who they are becoming. I can only hope that someday they feel that I played a small role in their accomplishments, for my entire world revolves around them. Before my son was born almost 5 years ago, I swore I would return to work full time after my maternity leave. Once I held him in my arms for the first time, my entire world changed...forever! I have never been the same since, and needless to say, have never returned to work! LOL. Now I have my daughter, too. It is such a honor to watch them grow and learn and be able to be the one to teach them everything they know. I am very blessed to be "able" to stay home with them and see every milestone. I believe it really makes a difference. I remember my mom ALWAYS being home when I was at school. ALWAYS being there when I needed her, wether it was if I was sick, sad, happy, whatever. It was such a secure feeling. Home was always where I wanted to be, even to this day. I love my home, and I have passed on that comfort to my children because we will be out somewhere and they will say, "Mom, Is it time to go home yet? We want to go home!" I am glad they love their home. It's a goal I strive for and accomplished. So, thanks Mom for instilling so many wonderful qualities in me and passing on your great mothering ways. I love you for all the time you have wrapped up in me over the last 40 years. No amount of gratitiude could ever show...but then again, your mom and mom just knows! I LOVE YOU and HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

It's time to clean out the crap!

It's spring time again, and here, that means YARD SALE! Every May, the first Saturday is dedicated to a community yard sale. It's pretty neat because everyone knows it's coming. No need to advertise, come rain or shine, it is on! Well, I kind of wish they would have made it for the END of May when the weather was a little more predictable. New York just got a foot of snow yesterday. It's been really cold at night here in PA. Dropping to about 30 degrees. BRRRR. So on Saturday morning, I have to get my aching but up at 4 am, truck out into the 30 degree weather, and set up for this yard sale. Last year we cleared almost a thousand dollars by noon.
I was sorting through all the baby things, Abby's baby things, and I can't believe she is out of the "baby stage"! She will be 20 months old on May 4! Gosh, how time is flying by. My sister has been gone for 14 months already and I still feel like it's a bad dream. I still talk to her every day, yell at her when something falls in the house, because I know she is there with me at times. I miss her sooo much I think my heart is going to break. No one should have to grow old without their siblings. I try to pound into my kids heads every day how blessed they are to have each other. And never -ever take it for granted...because you never know what tomorrow holds.

Ready for a Splurge!

Have you ever wished you could just go shopping and buy whatever you wanted! Hell, I just wish I could go shopping! I would be happy with a day of window shopping! My dear daughter is at the age (19months) where she DON'T let mommy out of her sight! Not even to take a pee. Seriously, I go to the bathroom, she follows behind me, unrolls the toilet paper for me, flushes the toilet and hands me the towel when I am done washing my hands. Don't get me wrong, it's really nice having my own personal assistant and all, but somedays, I just want some peace! My kids are the greatest joys of my life, and I wouldn't want to live one single day without them. But I sure would like to have a "me" day. You know, the one where you get to go to ANY store YOU want to and stay for however long you want to! I can't even imagine that! It's been like six years since I have done that. Maybe longer. If my son has something he needs to go to the store for, it's let's get it and go! My daughter has only been to Wal Mart once in her 19 months of life! I'm not big on taking babies into germ infested stores like Wal Mart. Bleh! They seem to want to crawl all over the floors and touch EVERYTHING in sight! Super BLEH! I don't know why I am in this mood today, maybe it's because everyone I know is out shopping, it's beautiful outside...too cold to hang out but sunny enough to take a ride to the mall! Perfect shopping weather. I am eating my heart out here! I guess I'll have to settle for Ebay and the JCPenney catalog! Again...BLEH!

Another day in the Life

I have alot of blogs that I follow on a daily basis. Most of them are about mother's who have lost their babies to some sort of traumatizing illness or death. I don't know how I find these blogs, or even why I choose to follow them, but my heart bleeds for these mothers. Most of these blogs I have been following over a year and they are still in a deep state of depression and greiving. Other's have moved on and are still somewhat saddned. I try not to think about how I would react if I were in that situation, because that is the main thing I ask God for when I say my prayers everyday. I pray to never let anything be wrong with my children, and never let them suffer in anyway. I know I could never handle losing one of my children. As I have discussed with my husband already, God forbid, if anything should ever happen to one of my kids, just bury me right next to them because I could never survive it. I get sick seeing what these womwn are going through on the internet. I can't even imagine what they are really fighting the other 23 1/2 hours that we don't see them. It's awful. These poor children at St. Jude's Children's Hospital fighting for their tiny little lives every day. I pray that God heals them all. I wish they didn't have to suffer and die. I donate monthly to the St. Jude Hospital Foundation, but I feel like I could do more. My stomache just flops when I see those children. Tears fill my eyes. Those have to be the strongest people ever! They really are my heroes. And when my kids get a little whiny and out of line, and complain that they don't have or they want, I show them the picture's I have on the refrigerator of some of the children at St. Jude that are fighting for their lives. I tell them that those children don't have the strength to go outside and play, or can't go home and be with their brother/sister's. They can't go to the park or to the store or play basketball or Karate. They are confined to a bed all the time because they are sick and don't even know if they are going to live to see their next Birthday or not. It usually strikes a nerve. Makes them realize what is important. For a little while, anyway. I just hope that these children know that there are people out there that truly care about them and want the best for them. God Bless all children...even mine!